Our Love, A Public Service - Chapter 85
Extra: Ning Qian and Wen Jin (3)
"You never attend these events."
"It's nice to see old friends." Even Wen Jin herself found the excuse unconvincing.
So, just friends then.
Wen Jin's words and expressions could still easily affect her mood, and Ning Qian didn't understand why she still felt disappointed. What she feared most was admitting that despite being hurt by Wen Jin, she still longed for her attention.
She was still so pathetic in love.
When Wen Jin had asked her out, Ning Qian hadn't intended to accept.
It wasn't because she didn't have feelings for Wen Jin anymore, but because this kind of love, for her, was more bitter than sweet. Ten years of unrequited love was enough, was she supposed to continue like this for the rest of her life?
Ning Qian turned her attention to the host on stage, trying to distract herself, she wasn't in the mood to enjoy the performances tonight.
Two hours later, the gala ended.
The audience began to leave.
Just like that orientation years ago, Ning Qian and Wen Jin sat side by side, but they barely spoke.
Wen Jin stood up and followed Ning Qian closely as they merged into the crowd.
"I liked you since university, I've always liked you…" Wen Jin looked at Ning Qian's back, remembering her confession after that night, her thoughts drifting back to her university days, realizing that most of her cherished memories involved Ning Qian.
Wen Jin had suspected Ning Qian's feelings for her, but Ning Qian was too good at hiding them, and over time, she had dismissed the thought.
If it weren't for that night, Wen Jin might never have known about Ning Qian's feelings, she might never have realized that her own feelings for Ning Qian were more than just friendship; but it was also because of that night that a seemingly insurmountable obstacle had appeared between them.
Wen Jin admitted that her initial offer to be with Ning Qian stemmed mostly from guilt and gratitude. She had hurt Ning Qian and wanted to make amends, but Ning Qian had refused. And thankfully, she had refused, allowing Wen Jin to face her own feelings rationally.
After the crowd dispersed, Wen Jin continued to walk beside Ning Qian, even though she lived in L City and rarely had time for leisurely strolls. "It's been a while since I've been here, let's walk around."
Looking at Wen Jin now, Ning Qian saw her past self. Appearing at the reunion, at the gala, always by her side, could it really be just a coincidence?
An electric scooter sped past on the narrow path.
"Careful, watch out for the—" Wen Jin quickly grabbed Ning Qian's hand, pulling her closer, then seeing Ning Qian's distracted expression, she chuckled. "You were always like this, so absent-minded."
Ning Qian tended to be absent-minded around Wen Jin, her thoughts always wandering to impossible fantasies involving Wen Jin.
Ning Qian snapped back to reality, her gaze falling on Wen Jin's hand holding hers. Her palm was so warm, almost burning. Ning Qian had fantasized about holding Wen Jin's hand countless times, imagining it would be cold, like Wen Jin's personality.
Wen Jin also paused, but instead of letting go, she tightened her grip. "Let's go this way."
Ning Qian let Wen Jin lead her, walking a few steps behind, her heart pounding as she looked at Wen Jin's profile. What was Wen Jin thinking? Why was she doing this, just as Ning Qian had decided to move on?
And Ning Qian realized she still couldn't bring herself to push Wen Jin away.
As they reached the familiar teaching building, Ning Qian pulled her hand away, her palm still tingling from Wen Jin's touch, perhaps because it was the first time Wen Jin had held her hand like that.
The bell rang, signaling the end of the last class, and students poured out of the building, heading towards the dormitories, the crowd gradually thinning.
The library was by the lake. Ning Qian walked along the path by the lake, then stopped, leaning against the railing, looking at the willow trees swaying gently in the breeze, their branches brushing against the water, creating ripples on the surface.
"How long are you staying in L City?" Wen Jin asked.
"I'm not sure, it depends." Ning Qian tried to maintain a casual tone as she looked at Wen Jin, telling herself she had to get used to this, hoping that in the future, their encounters would be just a polite nod and a smile.
"Are you free tomorrow night? I'd like to treat you to dinner."
"Tomorrow night?" Ning Qian tucked her windblown hair behind her ear and smiled at Wen Jin. "I can't, I have a date."
Wen Jin's voice held a hint of suspicion. "...A blind date?"
"Yes, the class president arranged it."
Wen Jin looked at Ning Qian intently. "Do you really want to go?"
"Why not? I saw his picture, he seems nice, it's worth meeting up and chatting." Ning Qian's tone was light and casual. "Blind dates aren't so bad, they're efficient and targeted, aren't they?"
Wen Jin's expression wasn't as carefree as Ning Qian's. Despite Ning Qian's attempts at nonchalance, Wen Jin could sense something else, just like that night, when Ning Qian had looked back, just as Wen Jin had known she would.
"I couldn't think of any other way to see you. I wanted to see you..." Wen Jin finally confessed, after a year of Ning Qian avoiding her, not replying to her messages, not answering her calls.
Her words, spoken in the quiet of the evening, resonated deeply with Ning Qian, especially that "I wanted to see you."
Their relationship was finally developing in the direction she had always hoped for, yet Ning Qian didn't feel any joy. She bit her lip, looking at the rippling water of the lake. "There's nothing to see, we just saw each other last year."
"Don't be mad at me anymore, please." Wen Jin took a step closer to Ning Qian, wanting to be near her, a gesture she had never made before.
"Why would I be mad at you? I don't understand what you're talking about." Ning Qian raised an eyebrow, checked the time, and said with a dismissive smile, "It's 10:30, I'm a bit tired, I'll be going now."
Wen Jin grabbed Ning Qian's hand. "Wait."
"What is it?"
"I'm not feeling well…"
Suddenly feeling unwell? Ning Qian was skeptical. "I'll get you a cab when we're off campus."
"I drove here. Could you… take me home?"
Ning Qian frowned.
Seeing her hesitation, Wen Jin didn't press further. "You can go, I'll just rest here for a bit."
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes…"
"Then I'll be going." Ning Qian said indifferently and turned to leave.
Just like that, she left. Wen Jin's heart sank; perhaps she had taken Ning Qian's kindness for granted, just like when she had asked Ning Qian out, assuming she would agree.
Some people, once missed, might never return. As Wen Jin stood there, lost in thought, she heard footsteps approaching. She looked up and saw Ning Qian walking back towards her.
Wen Jin couldn't help but smile, a genuine, heartfelt smile, brighter than ever before.
Under the warm glow of the streetlights, Ning Qian saw Wen Jin's smile, wishing she had seen it years ago. But now, everything felt different…
"Where did you park your car?"
"At the east gate."
"I'll take you."
As soon as they were in the car, Ning Qian fastened her seatbelt. "I'm taking you to the hospital first."
"It's not necessary." Wen Jin leaned back in the passenger seat.
"Let's just go." Ning Qian drove towards the nearest hospital.
After a late-night trip to the hospital, it turned out to be just low blood sugar, nothing serious. Ning Qian was relieved, but she still insisted on taking Wen Jin home.
Wen Jin had moved to a new apartment after her divorce last year. Ning Qian had been here a few times, and certain events in this apartment, she would never forget.
"Still feeling unwell?" Ning Qian helped Wen Jin onto the sofa. "I'll get you some water and your medicine."
Ning Qian had told herself countless times not to worry about Wen Jin, but she couldn't help it.
"Qianqian…" Wen Jin pulled Ning Qian down onto the sofa beside her and, without a word, embraced her tightly. She wasn't feeling well, but it was partly an act; she couldn't think of any other way to make Ning Qian stay, to exploit Ning Qian's concern for her.
Ning Qian froze in Wen Jin's embrace, inhaling her familiar, intoxicating fragrance, her mind in turmoil. She could feel how much thinner Wen Jin had become, her first reaction one of heartache…
"Don't do this." Ning Qian took a deep breath, trying to maintain her composure, and gently pushed Wen Jin away.
"Just let me hold you for a while." Wen Jin rested her head on Ning Qian's shoulder, whispering, her embrace tightening. Holding Ning Qian now felt completely different from before.
"Wen Jin…" Her embrace was torture, a sweet torture Ning Qian didn't have the courage to escape.
"I'm sorry." Wen Jin looked up at Ning Qian. She had apologized to Ning Qian many times before, but this time was different. "Can you forgive me? Don't avoid me anymore…"
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