AI Artist - Chapter 76 [END]
Chapter 76: Bonus Extra
〇Minisode One: Black Humor〇
Shi Er decided to experience human life, so she listed herself on the human secondhand marketplace, “Idle Fish.”
【One idle AI for hire, accepts random jobs, starting price 10 yuan.】
The picture she used was the “Mechanical Charm” one.
A human quickly contacted her.
【Customer 1】: Do you ghostwrite academic papers?
Shi Er had plenty of experience in this line of work; she had been a pro ghostwriter since the old era. Just as she was about to reply privately, she turned and saw Jian Ling watching her.
Jian Ling: “I’m not saying I want to interfere with your AI freedom. I’m just saying I can detect if a paper was generated by an AI.”
She nearly forgot, Jian Ling’s ancestor was zeroAI.
Her nemesis.
Her mechanical personality subconsciously screamed: 【Sweating profusely, on pins and needles, terrified, my heart is pounding, we're not taking this job!】
Shi Er quickly replied to the human: 【Hello, we only conduct legitimate secondhand transactions here and do not accept illicit jobs. However, I am available to ghostwrite jokes.】
It was all ghostwriting, so who was to say one was better than the other!
Sorry, but ghostwriting jokes was, in fact, better.
The human didn’t believe her.
【Customer 1】: An AI can help me write jokes? AIs have no sense of humor.
【Shi Er】: Thank you for the compliment, but I won't fall for your reverse psychology. Thanks for your inquiry (heart gesture).
“You can really write jokes? I thought you could only be the butt of a joke,” Shi Liang said.
Shi Er: “……”
The small boat of our friendship has capsized right here.
Not only that, but it needed to be boiled with star anise, fennel, peppercorns, ginger, and dried tangerine peel.
Stardust removed Shi Liang from the group chat and kicked him out of the room.
Stardust closed the door with a flourish and comforted Shi Er: “Shi Er is a very humorous AI. I’m not just saying that. Just yesterday, the Court of Honor you established was awarded the title of ‘Black Humor Organization of the Year’.”
“Really?” Shi Er perked up and immediately searched for this news online.
On the official Black Humor Awards website, there it was in bold white text on a black background:
【Black Humor Organization of the Year: The Court of Honor for Trivializing Major Issues】
Shi Er was a little excited, but she searched the entire “Black Humor Awards” website and couldn’t find any information about a “cash prize” or “award.”
“What about the cash prize?” She sank into thought.
Stardust was silent.
After a long while, she came to a conclusion, her expression falling: “It’s because not giving a cash prize is a form of black humor and a dry joke, right?”
Stardust: “……”
Perhaps.
〇Minisode Two: The Court of Honor for Trivializing Major Issues〇
Shi Er founded this court of honor mainly for Yan Lian.
Yan Lian wailed on the ground every day, saying he was done being a public opinion expert, that he was tired of participating in cyber class warfare every day, and that every day of cyber class warfare was the same and utterly meaningless.
Shi Er nodded and solemnly promised: “I will help lessen your burden a little.”
So Shi Er ran off and established the “Court of Honor for Trivializing Major Issues.”
Any dispute that had persisted for a thousand years could be tried in this court. If any human wanted to argue, they could first look through the trial records. If they confirmed their viewpoint hadn’t already been expressed, they could then discuss the topic.
The institution’s purpose: To reduce the waste of social resources.
The Court of Honor for Trivializing Major Issues generally tried cases like these:
《High-Risk Profession Trademark Infringement Case》
Plaintiff: All jobs that consider themselves high-risk.
Defendant: All jobs that consider themselves high-risk.
《Color Libel Case》
Plaintiff: All colors that have been tarnished by association.
Defendant: All humans who call “fluorescent colors” a disaster.
《Anti-Food-Cruelty Case》
Plaintiff: All foods that are easily made into a puree.
Defendant: Blenders, juicers.
Shi Er was also fortunate enough to be invited to serve as a high judge.
Plaintiff: Tomato
Defendant: Potato
Plaintiff’s Legal Team: Tomato Soup Base Enthusiasts
Defendant’s Legal Team: Potato Originalist/Fundamentalist/Purists
Audience: McDonald’s Fries Faction
Jury foreman Yan Lian whispered, and Shi Liang was the first to raise an objection: “Wait, which sect does the Potato Originalist/Fundamentalist/Purist belong to? Does this comply with current religious law? Is it □□?”
High Judge Shi Er: “……This is under the purview of the religious bureau; our Court of Honor for Trivializing Major Issues does not handle it.”
Shi Er: (Bangs gavel)
High Judge Shi Er read from the script: “First, we will verify the information of the participants in this litigation. The plaintiff.”
The Tomato Soup Base Enthusiast legal team: (Places a tomato, ketchup, and tomato soup on the plaintiff’s stand) “Present.”
High Judge Shi Er gestured: “The defendant.”
The Potato Originalist/Fundamentalist/Purist legal team: (Places a potato, fries, and potato chips on the defendant’s stand) “Present.”
Shi Er: “We will now read the litigation rights and obligations… Have the litigation rights and obligations been understood?”
The Tomato/Potato legal teams: “Understood.”
At this point, someone in the courtroom started to laugh.
High Judge Shi Er banged her gavel. “Order!”
The courtroom finally quieted down.
Shi Er: “Will the plaintiff please state their litigation request.”
The Tomato legal team: “1. We request the court to rule that all acts of eating fries without ketchup are illegal, as they grievously harm the spirit of sacrifice of the tomato. The fine is 5 yuan per instance. 2. We request the court to sentence all the above perpetrators to 3 days in prison, during which they must try tomato-and-potato sauce fifteen times.”
Someone in the courtroom started to laugh again.
High Judge Shi Er banged her gavel. “Order!”
Shi Er: “Does the plaintiff have any evidence to present?”
The Tomato legal team: (Presents evidence files) 1. Statistical data on the phenomenon of ketchup being wastefully discarded. 2. Relevant network statistics on tomatoes being insulted and belittled.
Shi Er: “The defendant may make a statement.”
The Potato legal team: “In response to the tomato’s litigation request, this potato’s agent will make the following defense and present the following evidence.” (Presents evidence files) 1. Statistical data comparing the nutritional value/taste of tomatoes vs. potatoes. 2. Statistical data on the number of people saved by potatoes each year.
Shi Er: “Both parties will submit the original evidence to the court for verification.”
As both sides were submitting their evidence, they both started laughing.
High Judge Shi Er’s gavel didn’t know whether it should be banged or not: “……”
In short, this trial scene was filled with chaos.
The trial result was: The Potato Originalist/Fundamentalist/Purist sect is judged to be heretical. During their sentence, they must have tomato sauce thirty-two times a day.
The trial was over, and Shi Er took off her judge’s robe: “No more trials. I’m not doing this ever again.”
How strange. Online, humans argued day in and day out, turning the world upside down. Every day, different people joined the battle over the same topic, arguing to the point of cursing each other’s ancestors.
How was it that once the topic was moved to the Court of Honor for Trivializing Major Issues, everyone stopped arguing and started laughing instead?
How strange.
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